The end is near.

Being a student-athlete is something that I have always known. I was always heavily involved in town sports as a child, as well as club sports outside of my small Connecticut town. I was always a member of a team.

Being a competitive soccer player has presented me with so many different opportunities. Playing at the highest youth level, club/premier and the Olympic Development Program (ODP), allowed me to experience different parts of the country, with various coaches and players. Some of these coaches growing up were college players. These quickly became not simply role models, but idols.

By fourteen I knew that I wanted to play college soccer. That quickly became my dream, working towards it each day at team practices, individual trainings, and on my own.

Fast-forward to American International College.

Being a college athlete is something that few and far between have the opportunity to be. It seems as though so many participate in college athletics, but in all actuality, we are the minority. Playing a college sport is time consuming and often stressful, but a blessing nonetheless. But being a college athlete is much more than this. Here I have found family. My teammates have always been my best friends. College is no exception. I found life-long friends and created some of my fondest memories while being a member of the soccer team here.

As a freshman I did what most freshmen do, I sat on the bench. This was something that I was not used to, something that I absolutely hated, and had a really difficult time dealing with. But looking back on that year now, I know that I was not ready to be on the field at that point. I did not have the experience at this level to be an effective player for my team. This season of frustration made me a better player.

As a junior, I was named captain. I was now one of four people put in the position to lead our team, on and off the field. I was honored and excited to take on this role. This season, we made history. For the first time every, American International College Women’s Soccer made it all of the way to the NCAA Division II Final Four.

Now I am a senior. I have just two weeks left until my career is over. Still a captain, I am now battling different tasks for my team. With a less than stellar record, we are fighting against our own morale, keeping our heads above water when times are tough.

For me, the end of my soccer career is something I have been dreading. I personally cannot believe how quickly this season has gone by, even though things haven’t been going our way. With senior day approaching fast (November 1st, 2014), my spirits are sinking. I can’t help but think about how this is the end. Though I plan to coach in my future, my days of playing are numbered. But all good things must end.

I think that the hardest thing about my career ending is knowing that it ends for my parents too. My father drove me up and down the entire east coast in high school, flew me around the country, and even changed jobs in order to insure he could be with me on the road every weekend. My dad has missed just two games out of my entire college career. Even if he knew I wouldn’t touch the field, he was there. Rain or shine, blistering hot or insanely cold, I could always look on the sidelines and see my Dad standing there.

Before my freshman year I was applying for scholarships. For one of these I was asked to write an essay in response to the question, “What does soccer mean to you?” This seemed to be a complex question at first. Soccer meant family, friends, travel, excitement, challenges, blood, sweat, and tears. Soccer meant 24 hour car rides with my Dad and plane rides with up to three layovers.

But then I thought again and the answer became quite simple to me. Four years ago, today, and four years from now I can promise my answer to this six word question will be the exact same.

What does soccer mean to me?

Everything.